Part 3
“
OK. So it’s piss.
Where are the machines though?”
It transpires that the (mostly dark) room is used by the
venue for raves; the pissy kind, rather than the illegal kind. I wonder for a
moment what possesses people to pay money to piss all over the floor in the
dark whilst listening to music with complete strangers. In the small amount of
time my brain allocates to this thought I fail to arrive at a logical answer. A
couple of the guys are kicking a ball around. As it comes
to a halt at my feet it’s clearly a plastic sphere, the contents of which are
partially illuminated by the daylight from the newly opened doorway.
“
Ah. That will be a
piss ball then.” somebody says over my shoulder. I don’t turn around to acknowledge
them because; well basically I've never seen a ball filled with piss. It’s all a
bit ‘Rock and Roll’…
Thankfully none of the cabs are stored in this area
whatsoever and we will only need to traverse what I like to call ‘Piss Alley’
on the way out. By this point the cabs will be safely protected from any rogue
golden showers on the back of sack trucks. In fact the first lot of cabs are in
an adjacent room off to one side.
“
Over here!!”
By the time I arrive the double doorway of
Room #1, it already has both
sides open and we get our first glimpse of a row of black cabs. Nobody does
anything. Each person seems momentarily routed to the spot. It’s as if everyone
had looked up ‘
In case of Raid, press
here’ in the manual of life and found nothing but a blank page.
“
Come on then, get
stuck in! Let’s get them dragged out and lined up!” shouts Raid leader#1.
There is a flurry of sack trolleys as 3 people all move
forward at the same time and go for the same cab…
Oh.
…and then suddenly, everything falls into place and we all
form an orderly queue, each clutching a sack trolley.
CLINK-SHLUNK! The first trolley slides under the rear of the nearest cab and
with a deft adjustment by the handler to take the weight; the machine is
wheeled out; probably for the first time in over 15 years.
The process is repeated…
CLINK-SHLUNK!...wait-for-the-guy-in-front-to-clear-his-cab-then-CLINK-SHLUNK! again.
And Again. The scene is like some kind of bizarre 80’s lottery as classic cab after
classic cab is dragged out:
Space Duel, Dragon’s Lair II, Missile
Command, Fast Freddie, Astron Belt, Mach 3, Dodgem, Arabian (!!), APB,
Paperboy, Indiana Jones, Lunar Lander , Vindicators, Tapper!, Road Runner,
Crazy Balloon, Asteroids and
Pole
Position. Mixed in amongst the video games are a few fruit machines too for
good measure.
“
Christ, this is only
the first room as well...” I hear somebody say.
The machines are not all on the floor either. We encounter
two large pallets filled with cabs; this only raises them a few inches off the
ground but it makes for difficult going with the trolleys. We ‘walk’ these
games across slowly, rhythmically, before multiple hands and arms gently lower
them over the edge and onto the waiting lip of the sack trucks. All of this in
the dark; with only a couple of torch lights dancing around the room; the
owners torn between shining their beams onto the dark outlines to see what the
next grail to be uncovered might be and actually pointing it where the
collective will gain some advantage.
“
Jodo, get this door
open more; it will give us more space…”
I stand in the entrance to the first room. If there was ever
a time to play the music from the idol scene at the beginning of
The Raiders of the Lost Ark, it’s
now. This is my chance to shine. My
chance to show that I came all this way for a reason. That I can make a
difference. I nudge the bottom of the door with the edge of my foot but it’s
stuck fast on the floor tiles and refuses to budge. Grasping the door at
opposite edges, I reposition my feet and pull; there is a creaking sound as……
….the entire door comes off in my hands.
I look over my shoulder at the suddenly silent collection of
people staring at my misfortune.
“
Bugger.” I say.
“
Come on mate, outta
the way. I think we’ve paid enough for these cabs already…” says Raid
Leader#2.
Somewhat disheartened by my stupidity I feel myself turning
a deep shade of red. In a matter of moments, I've managed to both halt the raid
production line and vandalise the property of the seller. Leaning the door overly-gently
against the wall, (the damage is already done…) I skulk away, resigned
momentarily to holding a torch. It will take me a good 10-15 minutes before I
feel confident enough to get back amongst em’ and start helping again but it’s
a sharp reminder to focus and take more care. This temporary bruising of my
pride doesn't last long.
After seeing what
Room #2 has to offer, how could it?
Jodo2015-03-27 23:48:13